Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
