you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
