yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
