and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
