Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
