Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
