I molested 6 butterflies tonight
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
