Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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