Christians are straight up FREAKS
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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