i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
