on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize