My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
