you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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