Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
The air taste purple.
Randomize
