I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
