so explain again why im purple
no
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
