He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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