Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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