on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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