do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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