There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize
