She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
