so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
