feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
