you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
