Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
