I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
