with your own penis?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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