is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
