Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize