I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
