I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
