There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
