i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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