I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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