The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
