if you like me you must not know who I am
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
