Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
