dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
