And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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