Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
