What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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