I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
