I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
