nut hugger
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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