Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
