Plan B is the new Plan A
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I supernannyed him into submission
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
