no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize