Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
