So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I understand Curling. That high.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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